Kung Fu Statesmen is a parody on the political world of the United Kingdom. You choose to play as either Gordon Brown, Tony Blair, or David Blunkett. The story quote is this:
Kung Fu Statesmen

"Kung Fu Labour are on a mission. Coming up to the election they need to bury the issues and find the pages from their '97 manifesto to avoid any awkward questions when the new one comes out."

Each character has a different way of attacking; Gordon karate chops, David gets his dog to bite, and Tony pushes with the palm of his hand.

You must find and bury every issue and recover every page. Each enemy only takes one attack to kill and then are symbolized as a tombstone. You have 5 lives and are timed.


These are the enemies in the order they appear:

  • Dog
  • Soldier in a red uniform
  • Man in a batman costume
  • Man in a spiderman costume
  • Girl protester
  • Guy protestor
  • Chef
  • Jamie Oliver
  • Soldier in a black uniform
  • Political member
  • Man in a superman costume
  • Big dog-human (can only stun)

click here to play.